Α14. The mind yearns for liberation inside the world.
Seven days later…
Seven consequent days of idleness proved to be too many for the under construction State of Freedom. Many worldly duties concurred and deprived the workers heart and mind of the creative momentum, which resulted in the total suspension of the works due to the impulsion of the acquired extroversion, even during the few hours which were left free every day. Moreover, a natural wear and tear occurred, as there has not yet been constructed any reinforcing infrastructure to support the work and protect it against worldly influences.
So, the fatal event occurred. Yesterday a woman showed up who did not appreciate the beauty and the usefulness of my work; she ignored it, implicitly yet clearly she rejected it and turned it down, as she did not want me to read further to her; obviously my writings, which I wanted to believe to be for everybody as valuable and exciting as they are for me, were irksome and boring to her.
And because my motive was hardly to merely channel the overflow of my joy and love to a sister but was primarily to extract praises and womanly stare full of awe, inner conflict befell, which resulted in tension and exhaustion in my body and mind.