Β10. My value is granted; why be anxious about it?

The State of Freedom
A journey of Truth into the mind’s sanctuary
with the destination of inner Freedom.

Β10.  My value is granted; why be anxious about it?

“I exist, hence I am worthy; this is the conclusion. In other words, my value is granted, regardless how good my performance may be in the struggle of life. My achievements cannot add to my value, for my value is the same as it was when I was a fetus and will not change until I die. Similarly, my failures cannot reduce my value. The value of my personality is a straight line, without any fluctuations at all. Its length is equal to the duration of my life, to wit to the lifetime of this very personality, from the moment when my soul launched into the fetus until my physical death.

“This constant value is infinite times higher than the ephemeral value which is added by the awe of my brothers or subtracted by their rejection. The infinite size of my value is not so much due to its lifelong duration; it is more due to the significance and the eternal duration of the benefit which my existence with the current human form in this world renders to my soul.

“Because, when my soul leaves this world, it will not take along any other achievement apart from the knowledge and freedom which will have blossomed in it, and this will have happened just by the very existence of his form, to wit of my personality or ego, which, merely by existing serves my soul in this life by providing it with experiences which are for it opportunities to obtain knowledge.

“According to Mathematics, whichever number one may add to infinity, it remains infinity. That’s why the ephemeral worldly eminence or disdain do not alter in the least the infinite size of my one and only value, which is the conscious or unconscious service that I render by my mere existence to the eternal ideals of knowledge, freedom and bliss of my soul and, by extension[1], of all sentient beings of the entire universe”.

Now the mind laughs full of joy; he is unexpectedly relieved after these realizations. All of a sudden, his brothers’ criticism loses its importance and he no longer cares about whether they agree or disagree with his words and deeds. As a result, his old anxiety also vanishes about what they will say, how they will look at him and whether they will gossip about him.

Moreover, his tenacious struggle for more achievements than the average brother also loses its importance. His old anxiety fades out, as he no longer counts the time day after day while he sees the years pass without that he has managed to collect the money and glory which other brothers, younger than him, have already managed to collect. Additionally, the feelings of jealousy and envy vanish, not because he finally achieved more than the others, but because he understood that for reasons irrelevant to his dexterity or inefficiency he was, is and will be of the same value as those brothers whom he has been envying all these years for their great worldly joys and achievements.

Apart from these, the fury, the despair and the self-blame also disappear, regarding his wrong choices of the past which deprived him of the much desired achievements, because the pursuit of the achievements has now become for the mind a simple childish game, on the outcome of which his self-esteem no longer depends in the least. However, he continues playing this game with his playmates, his brothers, with no more yearning for victory and glory, but simply and only because he loves his brothers and palpitates by utmost joy while he talks with them and stays close to them with the occasion of this game.

Now that his values have been reviewed and changed radically, the mind also rejoices for something else, which is very important: the former opponents, the “others”, are no more objects of envy or sucking of joy. They became “broth­ers”, that is to say objects of his concern and recipients of his friendship, love and compassion. These are indispensable values of solidarity for himself and for all his brothers to live well in this unknown, hard and adverse world in which we have found ourselves shoulder to shoulder for a few years – and not for an eternal life, as the mind used to believe previously, when he was still young and inexperienced and therefore used to think that this life would last so long that it was worth all the pain and anxiety for the material and emotional ensuring of its future.

The mind now remembers how he felt and behaved in those days; he was troubled, blinkered, unsmiling, fanatic, often ob­noxious and inhumane. He empathizes with his agonies of those times, compassionates him, smiles at him understand­ingly and affectionately and says to that tortured self of his of the past: “You will see, the day will come when all these will not burn you anymore and, instead, you will be playing smoothly and lightly in the world, devoid of anxieties and sor­row, full of joy for the very game you will be playing with your brothers”. Immediately he sees that past self of his sweeten and simmer down, while his mind temporarily becomes de­tached from the countless vain maladies which had been harassing and pestering him and quits the useless struggle to prove his value and make the others recognize it. In this way, the mind heals his own past and lays solid foundations inside himself to build on it his new healthy conception regarding the values of this world.

Below I quote an excerpt of “Les Misérables” of Victor Hugo regarding the matter of worthiness, which is very often mis-taken for success:

“We live in a dreary society. Be successful! This is the only command which falls drop by drop, from the corruption that dominates.

“Let’s say also this; success is a rather vile thing. Its fake similarity to worthiness misleads people. For the crowd, suc­cess looks exactly like supremacy. Success, the misrepres­entation of this talent, often deludes even History. Only Ju­venalis and Tacitus[2] whip it. In our days, there is a philosophy which has nearly become official and works in the service of success; its very theory is success. Success uses skillfulness as its assistant. Win the lottery and you will be immediately considered as a worthy person. Whoever triumphs, is glorified. Be born rich, and you will be an admirable person. If luck fa­vors you, you will have everything you want; if you are happy, everybody will say you are great. Apart from five or six excep­tions, which grace the whole century, the admiration of con­temporary people for others is pure stupidity. The gold plating is taken for pure gold. If you are an insignificant nobody, this does not annoy anyone, provided that you have been suc­cessful. A vulgar person narcissizes; he cherishes himself and applauds vulgar things. Geniosity, that great advantage of Moses, Aeschylus, Dante, Michelangelo or Napoleon; the crowd instantly ascribes it in unison to anybody who achieves any of his goals. If a notary public becomes Member of Par­liament; if a eunuch obtains his own harem; if a pharmacist has found a way to produce carton soles for the army and now earns a yearly income of four hundred thousand francs, this makes him worthy. A chanter becomes bishop because he chants with a nasal tone, a housekeeper in a rich house be­comes so rich that he is declared a minister –the crowd calls all these people genius. Thus, they confuse the constellations of the celestial dome for the starlike tracks the geese leave while walking on the mud…”

(translation to English from a Greek version of the book)