Β5. Acts of care for my self.
My mind has realized that, if I want to enjoy an unperturbed sleep and dream of saints and God instead of anxiety-inducing issues relating to the field of matter, I must need to spend my afternoons and evenings with introspection, meditation and writing, sports and quality music and whatever else can produce a feeling of peacefulness, freedom and emotional uplift inside me. He chooses to abstain from working in the field of matter during these hours, as well as from talking about issues concerning the field of matter. He also chooses to eschew non-creative interaction with others which can only temporarily fill up his emotional void caused by the prolonged refraining from inner work with himself.
He keeps forgiving me and smoothing every anxiety and inner tension in me with compassion and sweetness; he prompts me to perpetrate acts of care for my self. An act of care for the self is to reserve for and devote to him quite some quality hours every afternoon and evening. Equally important is to interrupt my occupation in the field of matter for a few minutes, whenever I become aware of an inner inconvenience, so as to remind myself regularly that no worldly field of friction is worth to make me anxious about it, since I know that I have come into this life for a totally different purpose.
Furthermore, he discourages me to slothfully devote myself and get attached to bodily and emotional delights beyond the duration I really need them to replenish myself with energy, no matter how refreshing and valuable these delights may be whenever they are received in moderation (food, sex, swimming, walks in nature and others). In other words, he urges me to stay constantly alert and ensure that often alternations occur within every single day of my life, so that the mind is trained to be flexible and give up his old delusive conviction that in only one thing can be found all truth and joy of life.
 This “must” is the “must” of affection and concern and has nothing to do – although it is acoustically exactly the same – with the furious “must” which the mind formerly used to say to me, before he learned to forgive and sympathize with me, when he was still mad with me due to the worldly joys which my mistakes, leniency and timidity had deprived him of.
Nevertheless, the mind notes, when he uses the word “need” instead of the word “must”, how sweet and welcome sounds to him the above realization and how his brain cells refrain from any kind of resistance to this hint and do not rebel against it, at all. The mind responds eagerly to the need implied by the word “need”, whereas he definitely resists to the imposition implied by the word “must”.
Consequently, as the mind understands now, even affection and concern should better be careful how they express themselves, so that they make themselves easily digestible and acceptable, without any resistance.
Moreover, it is not only the way of expression that changes. These are two totally different worlds, two diametrically opposed to each other philosophies, two different worldviews, two alien to each other perceptions about what life is and what for we exist and live. All these issues lie beneath this plain differentiation in the way of wording a thought. Hence, the mind, merely by consciously changing the wording, manages to remind himself of the simple and beautiful side of life, thus extricating himself from his fixed repressions and allowing himself to feel free and joyful.